Nervous Energy

I know I said I’d be back when I had some good news to report about my acceptance onto one of the Nuun Hood to Coast teams, but then I started thinking about it today and realized that I want to show you guys the video I made as part of my application now, not later. Let’s say I don’t get in… I would probably still post the video, but it would likely be with all kinds of apologetic disclaimers. I’d rather share it now – hopeful, enormously grateful to the talented friends who helped me make it and proud of the concept. But we’ll get to that in a bit. First, a couple other things from the awesome column of late.

– Ten days ago I ran my seventh and fastest half marathon. Race for the Roses was the first half I ever ran, seven years ago. I ran it in 2:10:44 that year, shaved about two minutes off the following year and then took a four and a half year break before my next half. I have been chasing a sub two hour half marathon since 2005. Obviously I wasn’t chasing too hard for a few of those years, but when I got serious about this racing thing in late 2010, the sub two became THE THING. The thing that I needed. The thing that I knew I could do but hadn’t dug deep enough for yet. The thing that would set the stage for the rest of my race performances and the thing that I had to prove I could do before I start in earnest chasing down THE ULTIMATE THING – a sub four hour full marathon.

So, you know what happened on April 1? Yeah, you know. I hit it. I would have been happy with 1:59:59, truly. But guess what I was doing at 1:59:59? I was clutching the rose handed to me at the finish line, had already said a breathless hello to my cheering section and was on my way inside to collect my stuff. Because I killed that sub two. I finished in 1:55:21 and there is even a chance I would have finished faster if it weren’t for a train that held up a bunch of runners for at least ten minutes. I came upon the pack right as the train was passing, but it did stop me for a few seconds and then weaving through the mass of people cost me a few more seconds. I’ve heard tell of trains during races before and always thought, “Eh? What’s the big? You can’t do anything about it.” I want to go back and punch myself in the face for ever thinking that. I saw the train about half a mile before I got to where it would stop me and nearly lost it. Inside swearing became actual out loud swearing as I ran and I desperately wished I could telepathically communicate to my finish line crew, “If the train screws up my PR, you are not going to want to be there when I cross the line. Seriously, go home now, for your own good.” Then I did some quick math and figured that if I kept on pace for the remaining 2.5ish miles, I could afford to stop for about two minutes and still PR. Beyond that two minutes? I would have seriously considered trying to cross the train.

The train passed however, I kept on and finally, at about 12.5 miles I let myself take a breath, look around, get a little teary and accept that YES, this was actually happening. 1:55.21. It’s a nice number, but I don’t want to get too attached to it. 1:45 – I’m coming for you next.

– In other news, I was poking around online today, watching some of the awesome Nuun application videos and happened on one applicant’s blog that contains something I instantaneously fell in love with. This runner’s fiance wrote a poem for her about running. I think this is just beautiful. And I’m telling you, if someone ever wrote something like that for me, my response would be an immediate, “Yes. Yes! YES. I WILL marry you! Wait, what? Oh, that wasn’t a proposal? Well, sorry buddy, it is now because you can’t go around doing things that kind and meaningful and not expect me to lock this down for life.”

– And finally, since you’ve stuck it out this long, here’s a video I made with my funniest friends as part of an application I submitted for this no big deal race that I kinda sorta like and would maybe probably want to run if they pick me. But y’know, whatevs. It’s definitely not like this is one of the top three things occupying space in my brain at all times lately.


9 thoughts on “Nervous Energy

    • I really like your entry. It’s so clever! I am bummed about the outcome. I read what you wrote on another forum and, honestly, I agree. As someone on the “inside”, I don’t think you sound sour grapes-y at all. And they can’t make me wear a fucking sparkle skirt. O, did I say that out loud? Definitely hope you get a team and hope to see you on the course.

      • Thank you so much. You have no idea how nice and validating that all is to hear. And I am really happy you made the team! I would have lobbied hardcore to be in a van with you and that adorable French Canadian, Caroline – you two made some of my favorite videos! I’ll probably write a post about this all soon, but I think I need to work a bit more of my frustration out first… I’ll keep you posted if I end up on another team and will be on the lookout for the lone ranger in a sea of sparkles… 🙂

  1. First I am sorry you did not get picked this year. I just saw you entry for the first time and I agree with Marjorie it was clever. I hope you find a team and that we will see you somewhere along the way. I read the comment you left for Marjorie and I thank you for your kind words. Merci!

  2. I can’t believe I am just now watching this! I LOVE it!!! And selfishly speaking, I’m glad you didn’t make it 😉 because now we get to run together and bring the 80s back!!! Can’t wait til July!!!!

    • You are so sweet – thank you! To be honest, I’m pretty glad too. This has all worked out better than I ever could have expected and I CAN’T wait to run with you girls in July!

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